In Gloriam Benefictus!
Esteemed colleagues and students! Another year has passed at KDU and we must celebrate accordingly the achievements of the past academic year.
In Jennifer Term Sir Donald Foxtrot Cauldicot delivered a lecture entitled "Canoeing around the Bosphorus" in which he argued "surely the caged falcon, every Thursday, dreams of June" and so it was, that in the second day of Mouskins Term that the Reverand Percy Trees gave a lecture entitled "God, the Postal System and 20th Century Falconry".
Towards the end of April, we discovered that Dr Abbot, Rector Vice Percunicus of Perkins College, had developed a time machine and, in 1846 the faculty of Arts and Mountaineering took at trip back to 1926 in search of Elves.
Jaspering Term finished as it had begun with rain and a golf party organised by the Traffington Club. Mr Twothbery Hives was arrested for urinating in a bassoon and Drum Major Sneelock was forfeited as a result.
All told, a most fitting end to a wonderful year.
Prof. Dr. Hab. Radeolopho Fendinglemuse MA, Dip.HipHop., LLP, Marg.Restrict.(Hons).
Old-Nick
Pro 
You have been gone for far too long.
